++ fEbRuArY ++
Date : 25.02.03 2:29 pm
Mood : Confused
Music : Lena Park ~ In My Dreams
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Saying I love you
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you
Not to say, but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do to make it real
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
Cos I'd already know
What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you
More than words
Now I've tried to talk to you and make you understand
All you have to do is close your eyes
And just reach out your hands and touch me
Hold me close don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
Cos I'd already know
What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you
More than words
Isn't this sweet? The tune is so nice, and unplugged. I love it! It must be
really good to listen this song in its unplugged live version. This is so
COOL!!!!
Date: 24.02.04 11:21 pm
Mood : Sleepy
Music : Making of Hikari
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Sharks! I thought Goat year should be a relatively better year for me. But it is
like no change. Hmm... Got myself into a thick mess as ever. Due to my fear of
dentist, i refused to go to any dentist for a year ++. In the end, got one huge
cavity, which gone deep down into my nerve channel and i have to do root canel
treatment. It is not as nice as it seems. First, they have to give you an
injection to numb your whole area. Then, drilling starts so as to cleanse the
teeth. The drilling will reach to the top of the nerve before it stops. After
that, they will have to remove the nerve, which is the main culprit for causing
tooth pain so that i will no longer be in pain. Then, they will cleanse the
whole teeth, put a temporary filling inside, and 9 months later, the treatment
will start. They will put antiseptic to kill all the germs in my "old"
nerve channel. Then, they will put in fillings and so on to replace the loss
nerves. Can you imagine it? They are going to extract my nerves. IT IS MY
NERVE!!! oh my. But it is really weird. I don't eat sweets very often and i
always brush my teeth twice a day. But yet, i still got such stupid thing. It
gives me a little pain now and then but i have to get it done asap to prevent
any more complications. So stupid.
A level results are coming out soon. O levels would be out probably in these two
days. my results would most probably be out next wed or this sat. Strangely,
unlike O levels, i do not have nitemares weeks before the release. Let's hope it
isn't too bad.
Date : 20.02.03 5:05 pm
Mood : Calm
Music : Utada Hikaru ~ Movin' on without you
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How much do u know about growing up in a money emphasized environment? How much
do you know about the loneliness and the heartache when you see ppl quarrel over
money? How much do you know about how people scold their only parents because
their parents could afford so much like others?? Have you seen these??
Money, though important, has been the root of all evil. I saw my own cousin
shouting at her own mother, telling her that she does not regard them as their
parents, telling her how lousy she is compared to her future husband-in-law. All
these started with placing too much importance on money. I have seen my own
cousin cursing her mother in front of me, trying to tell me how lousy her mother
is, how i should not respect her. I have seen my mother telling me that it's
okay that my dad has mistress, cause if anything happens, she will have half of
the assets ?Have u seen these? Have u hear these? Have you seen ppl belitting
their own kin for money? If you had, i am sure u would revise your concept of
money. We all need money to survive, because we need it to buy necessities as
well as luxurious goods. But why be enslaved by money? THe more importance u
place on it, the obsession will be so great that you would think it is never
enough.
I am no saint. I want good life, good food and everything good too. But i know
that even if u have a billions of assets, you might just be the most miserable
man on earth. My dad has alot of money, but i dun think tat he is a happy man
really.
What i want to say is that, don't put making money as ur utmost priority or even
near to the very top. BEcause by the end of your life, you will have many pieces
of paper to accompany you. Is that meaningful? Have it your way then.
Date : 08.02.03 12:21 pm
Mood : Disappointed
Music : SHE ~ Ai Wo De ZI Ge
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Hiding behind an empty shadow
Stealing glances into the mirror
I stopped at where i was standing
Waiting to sneak past you
Greyish paint on the wall
I wonder if it is just my infatuation
I saw you sitting down by the burning fire
Suddenly i have an impulse to run towards you
The clouds are moving
Are you moving away from me too?
Touching story ending
Would you find it too sentimental?
I tried to run away from you
But there is another invisible force holding me back
The thread that we once held on to
has already broken now
SO why do i still want to find it now?
The mountains can separate people into two realms
Maybe we are just standing at the two sides of a mountain
So near yet so far to each other
Though we can see the same orange sunset from where we are
But the feeling is so distant
In the middle of nowhere
I am standing between confusion and desire
Sinking slowly into my own misery
Would you pull me out from it?
The clouds are moving
Are you moving away from me too?
Touching story ending
Would you find it too sentimental?
Following the route that you have traced out once
Do you still remember the promises we made?
The letter which you have left behind
Still remains unopened in my drawer
Am i just trying to delude myself?
The tears that i have shed for you
Has left a watermark in my blurred memories
I still hold you so dear in my heart
The destination that i have strive so hard to reach
actually is just in front of me
CNY
Date: 02.02.03
Mood : Calm
Music : Chemistry ~ Back Together
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Happy Chinese NEW YEAR!!! Oh my.. i can't believe it is new year so soon again..
but then again.. this new year seems to be lacking of something... i dont' know
what either... haiz...
How contridicting can we humans be? I mean, for me... When i didn't have any
jobs, i was frustrated with myself... suddenly when i have a few jobs... i dun
feel like working anymore! Haiz.. but i should work, for myself as well as for
my family. I am going to start work in an MNC IT company on tues as a
telemarketer... i don't know what is going to happen, but i hope that everything
will go fine for me..... have to speak to those big shots... ah!! ECONOMY MUST
REVIVE!! So that everyone would be more willing to attend the seminars and make
my job easier... lalalala
Actually i am very numb now... no happy feelings nor sad feelings... just go on
life everyday as it should be.. maybe this is one of the major drawbacks of
growing up....... i don't really know anymore....
As for the future, i just leave everything to Lord because no matter how much i
think about it, the answer is still unknown.. i just continue with my work....
make myself more comfortable....
Happy Lunar New Year